Godzilla's big Island bash!
by Nick Dahdah
Summary: A funny Skit story about extreame ripoffs, the meaing of Life, and two very strange cowboy monsters on that one mountain...
1. Chapter 1

Hello, I'm Nick Dahdah

Hello, I'm Nick Dahdah

Godzilla's big Island Bash.

Waiting for the brat.

Godzilla and Jr. were sitting in the King's cave, reading the _Monster Island times. _Tonight was the Valetine dance at Minya's High school (He was a sophomore. Godzilla and Jr. were waiting for him to come home. Finally, he did.

Minya came stumbleing in, his bow tie on his tuxedo undone. He was simling from Ear to ear. Jr. noticed him first, and said "Hey man, how'd your date with that chick go?"

"Well, We walking home, and she kissed me just now!" Then Minya fainted. Godzilla and Jr. walked over, and looked at him for a moment, and checked his pulse. "Ugh…I think his heart stopped." Jr. said. "He can for three minutes like that, right?

The mighty King spoke. "Supposed to. Here, let me revive him."

"Can't we just bury him outside? No one'll know what happened. We could just say it was an accident." Godzilla just shook his head, and stomped on him..

, and asked what just happened. Jr. replied, "You said a hot girl kissed you, then you fainted."

"Oh, Yeah." Minya fainted again. This time, Jr. Jumped on him, with the same results.

Finally, Godzilla got mad, and charged up his beam. He hit Minya with it, but burned off all skin, just leaving his bones there. Godzilla and Jr. Quickly looked around, and just kicked them into the warm red water.

(Don't worry though, Minya isn't dead, He'll be back.)

Two and a half monsters.

Godzilla, Rodan, and Angruis (The Godzilla gang) were sitting around in Rodan's underground laboratory, watching the game. When it cut to a commercial, Rodan said to Angruis, "Hey, Spike Back, Look, little Godzookie got in trounle at school."

Let me explain: Seeing as Godzookie is supposed to Godzilla's nephew, I came to the conclusion that Rodan and Biollante had mated. But they're divorced now. (For obvious reasons)

Anyway, "Look, I gotta go to his school and talk to the principal about it with her. Could watch my Clinic (He was also Super smart, a scientist and a doctor. Hey man, I first came up with this stuff when I was 11) for me. Can you do that?"

"Sure thing man."

"So…" Godzilla began, "What'd my stupid nephew get into this time?"

"Look." Rodan held up a icture of a Mothra larva with large bugles in the…chestal ring are. (If you catch my drift. You don't? Well, then, you'r gay. Proabaly.) Godzilla looked at it for a moment, then said "Why did he sign? He could have gotten away from it. On that same note, Didn't someone else already use this exact same scenario in another show? Why is the author so uncreative? Infact, why are you reading this? Because you like? Well…In that case keep reading. I make more money that way."

So, tomorrow came, and Rodan went to the meeting, while Angruis sat at the greeting table, telling people to get lost. Until a very suggestive massue came in (It was that one K-Girl from Neo monster Island) He told her to go right ahead.

Meanwhile, Rodan was sitting next to that Mothra chick's mother. Who, like her daughter, had extreamly, huge, wings. (Are you a radioactive undead Tperatactlye? No? Then don't question his judement. But, if you happen to be one, Drop me a line I really wanna meet you)

So, Rodan was nervouse, and tried to engage in conversation, but just ended up saying thatshe sufferd from "WWS" (Wide Wing Syndrome)

After the Horrible meeting He went through, Rodan stopped by his clinic to check on Angruis. "How was the day?"

"Exactly you described it. But whose this masseu?" As if on cue, the babe walked out. (She was a female Tperatclye) Rodan's Eyes bulged "I fired you!"

No you didn't."

"Yes I did. And just since you don't believe me, I have to call in the expert." Suddenly, there was a bright flash, and a giant golden T robot appeared. At is helm, was THE DONALD.

"Now, look. You're pretty, You're good at what you do. But frankly, we don't need you. You can't stay with us. So, Honey, You're fired." He pointed at her with one of the robot fingers, and vaporized her.

There Unfortuantely) Will be more.

And there will be Blood, because this is no Country for Old Men, and because Micheal Clayton is trying to make Atonement with Juno.


	2. Chapter 2

Hello, I'm Nick Dahdah

Sorry I had to miss last week.

Broke Back Volcano.

Gather 'round me people, there's a story I need tell-About two brave monsters no one remembers well.

Their names were Hitodah (A giant, mutant starfish) and Redmoon. (He's ugh…Look it up) Anyway, they came to Monster Island, looking for work. They approached the great king himself, in all of his glorious majesty. "So…Could we have have the jobs we want?"

Godzilla looked at them, reviewing their auditions. They sang danced, and gave raspbeery award wining performances.

"Well, we don't like you. And you seem a little…_Gay _for our tastes.We're going to have to ask you to leave."

"A little to _gay?_" Hitodah asked. "What do you mean?"

"Well, look at you. You're all flamboyant, and phaylic looking. How are you not gay?"

"Well, We're not. Even if we were, do you have something against gay people?"

"Dude, We're ultraconservatives."

"Oh. Well, then let's prove it to you. We'll go spend a night out on the volcano ."

And so they did. Godzilla lended them some camping gear, and they camped out on the rock face.

As the two were going to sleep, they kept muttering. "We ain't no gay people. Shit, I'mevjust thinking about it."

"Yeah. Hey, Hitodah, did anyone ever tell you about how buetiful yor eye looks in the moonlight? "

"No. Your sitting one of my Starfish legs man. Wait, that's my leg…"

"Its not? Then what is it, and what's that white stuff coming out of it. It looks tasty." RedMoon began to slurp it up.

"Wait a minute, dude that's not- Oh that feels so good." Soon, both Male monsters couldn't hold it back any longer. Let's just say, that night all the monsters were looking outside, as the volcano blew, and then began pumping out the liguid inside.

They next day, the two reported to Godzila's throne room. "were you two Queers hit by the explsion last night?"

"No sir. We used protection."

"Ah…Well, We haven't revied the tapes yet, but you don't seem to have done anything."

"Why no sir. Like I said yesterday, we're not gay, even though we're democrats."

"You realize I'm a rpublican, and that You're about to die?"

"Yes sir." And they left ina aplume of smoke."

Goddzila turned to Rodan, who was sitting next to him. "Did you get it?"

"Yeah."

The Godzilla gang went to Rodan's underground lab, where they analyzed the permone signatures that Rodan took. They concluded that the two monsters were in heat when standing next to one another. G the tapes, they knew the truth, and set up their elaborate plans.

Godzilla had the two monsters go a second night. But, come darkness, the Godzilla gang set up some stuff and waited. Finally, two monsters showed, and began to make **WHOPPE! **Then the three of them turned on several lights, exposing the wo monsters.

"Ah-ha! We caught you two- Wait you're not the same guys!" Indeed they weren't, It was GINO and the Cloverfield guy. "Tell you what, we'll deal with you later, we sters to bust. They moved on.

They found the other guys, and shined the lights on them. Hitodah and Redmoon looked up from their gayness. "Ah-ha! We found you two gaydars! Now you're gonna pay, you disgraces!"

"Okay, How much? Hitodah said, counting out some money.

Godzilla charged up his breath, and blew them apart.

I'll Be back next week!


	3. Chapter 3

Hello, I'm Nick Dahdah

Hello.

Minya's stupidty.

The Godzilla gang were sitting in Rodan's secrete underground laboratory that everybody knew about. They were watching the game, and when it cut to Commercial, Godzilla started talking about Godzooky and his thing at school.

"I'm just saying, neither of my sons are stupid enough to do make fun of a Mothra larva's rings, and both are too much of cowards to make of an adult Mothra's rings." At that moment the phone rang. Rodan got it. It was for Godzilla. The king answered it, and Un-Hun a few times. Then he hung. "Speak of the Devil. Minya just made fun a Mothra larva's large rings." Godzilla sat down, and continued to watch the game.

Minya was sitting at home, playing a game with Junior. Godzilla walked in, let them finish their match, then called Minya away. He stood him up, and stomped down on him.

"Why the Hell are you making of teenage chicks Man?"

"I just couldn't help it!" Godzilla stomped on his stomach.

"Haven't I taught you the rules of life Son?"

"No." Godzilla slapped him in the face with his tail.

"That's for not reminding me to teach them to you."

"How was I supposed to know you were to teach them to me?" Godzilla stomped on him again.

"You were supposed to be born knowing them."

"Okay Dad, this can be a very good teaching time: Why is Junior older than me, but I was born first?"

"I like him better. Plus, seeing as I'm really God, I can screw with time. Now Minya, You're going to go apologize to that young girl. Junior will go with you, and teach you a little on the way there. Hear that soin?"

"Yes sir!"

And so they went. They swum over to Mothra Island, and went into one of the caves there. It was somewhat covered with webbing, and a few Moths here and there. They ran into a Moth with a leather jacket on.

"Hey, You guys want some Seaweeed? Real cheap."

"What do I do?" Minya asked.

"What the United states government should do to drug dealers world wide." Junoir charged up his spines, and blew the drug dealer apart. They continued into the heart of the hive, where they saw dozens of groups of Mothra hippies tie dieing their wings, walked around in their birthday suits, and having weird high Orgies. Minya felt the ants of his rubber suit go tight.

Finally, they met up with the Mothra ,inya insulted.

"Hello." Minya said.

"Oh, Why, Hello." The Mothra giggled at him.

"I'd just like to say that I'm sorry for how I acted the other day, and would like to apologize."

"Ahhhh, you're so sweet. And I kind liked you're comments."

"Hun?" Him and Junior said.

"They were so cute." She reared up on her tail, and kissed Minya right on lips. When she pulled out, Minya had a bunch of sliky webbing covering his mouth. He pulled it off, looked at Junior, and "Women."

DOOMSDAY

Godzilla was attacking Japan, minding his own business, when the Amrican Godzilla jumped up and attacked him. Before Godzilla could respond, GINO had him on the ground, and was clawing into his flesh. Godzilla tried to get a thim, but GINO had taken him completely by surprise, and was digging his guts out, and eating some of them. Godzilla was losing consucness fast, he was being beaten by a _loser!_

After a few minutes, The real Godzilla was just a tattered pile of flesh, with GINO standing over him. With this event, Metors streaked across the sky, tearing it apart, explsions went off, the seas dried up, the mark of beast was apparent…

Minya woke up screaming, bringing his father and brother running over to him. Godzilla sat down in front of him, and asked "What's wrong?"

"I had a nightmare you killed by GINO!"

Godzilla's eyes filled with rage "What?! You're not supposed to be thinking about hat sort of thing!" Godzilla spraweled Minya across the floor with his tail. Minya got up.

"It was a dream, I wasn't consiully thinking about it!" Godzilla tail whipped him again.

"You're not in control of your dreams? Shame on you!"

"It was a nightmare! I was scared of it!" Godzilla stomped on him.

"You're supposed to be scared of anything!"

_Continued next week!_


	4. Chapter 4

Hello, I'm Nick Dahdah

Hello. Again. For the last time. (Well, 'll continue the story but You know, you should die lyuaghing.

Rodan's Pieces.

Godzilla and Anguirius were Rodan's underground laboratory watching the game, but Rodan was hard at work at his desk.

Godzilla turned to look at him and said "Hey Man, why don't you relax and come watch the game with us? What are you doing anyway?"

"I'm starting my own choclate business! I want to create the perfect chocolate candy. I think I can work hard enough to figure it out."

"Whydo you want to make your own chocolate bossiness?"

"To make money dammit! I mean you're friggin' king! You don't know what its like to be moderately rich from movie making! You what its like to be _extremely _rich from movie making."

"Oh. Why don't you just go back to acting?"

"Well, #1 the execs at Toho are dilweeds, and are waiting a few yearsso they can reignite intrest in the serires. #2: Since Bush came into office, the job market sucks bad. I mean, you don't wanna know what some of those Mothras hare having to do to get by."

"Alright, Alright, get back to your chocolate. Pussy."

That night, as Rodan lay restlessly in bed, the answer came to him. The answer was 42, but first he had to find the question. Then, the second answer (To his chocolate problem) came to him. He jumped up in bed and hit his head on the roof.

"Ow! Why would I put my bed right where I could hit my head?! Wait a minute, that rhymes! Ow! My head again!"

The next day, Rodan went down to MechaGodzillas's fast goof restruant. He made a deal with the manager to sell his chocolates there. After a period of several weeks, it turned out that they sold extradionarily wellSo, he ordered several more batches and Rodan delivered them a week later. Mc. Godzilla picked one up, and popped it into his mouth. "Say Rodan, what's your secrete, tell me."

"Well, Its very simple actually: I just eat a lot, and crap out little pops of what you just ate."

Coca Cola ad.

King walked into the frame and began to battle with Godzilla. Godzilla quickly stomped onto Kong, and smashed him into the dirt. Then, a hand reached over, and gave Kong a can of coke. He drank it down, and stood up real tall, and real mean. Then, He punched Godzilla a couple of times, wrestled him to the ground, picked him up by the tail, and swung him around. Kong put his hands on his hips and said "Coca cola: Its I use to beat evil monsters that are obviously better, stronger, and coller than I am. It's a way to be extreamly cheap, while buygin something extreamly expensive. For Men. And Monkeis."

That was an ad Kong had agreed to do a few years back. Ironcially, a few weeks after it aired, and showed for 40 billion more times, Godzilla went Atlanta, and stomped on the Coca cola factory, saying "This was only a warning. Do anything like this again, and its war.


	5. Chapter 5

Hello, I'm Nick Dahdah

Hello, I'm sorry I missed the last two weeks. Anyway, here's a new story.

As the Monster world turns.

Godzilla, Angruisis and Rodan were sitting Rodan's underground lab watching the game. When it cut to commercial, Godzilla asked Rodan, "Hey, what's your ex-wife doing?"

"Why do you care?"

"Because she's my sister and I'm interested in her affairs."

"You what she would say to that? 'Why have you got to be so _Controlling? _Uts _MY _;ofe! Let me live the way _I _want to!"

Godzilla and Angruiis were laughing. Then the game came back on. When cut back to commercial, Godzilla asked him.

"Last I heard, she was dating Kong."

"**WHAT!?**"

"You heard me.

"Tat has to end now."

"You have to do it man, its not my problem."

"You're right. Soon as this game's over, I 'm going over there and telling my sister how to run her life!"

It ended. Godzilla set out ofor Skull island alone. He wasn't afraid of it. Anyway, He got over there around sunset. Godzilla walked out onto the beach and forced the natives to open the gate for him. (He had respect for Kong's peeps). And they're all to scale)

He went into the jungle, and to the base of Kong's little cliff outcropping. He was looking up at it so he called out: "Kong! Kong get out and show you're ugly monkey face!"

Kong came running out on top of it. "What the Hell to you want asshole?"

"I want the truth: Are you dating my sister?"

"Biollante? Hell yeah man!"  
"You're trying to get back at me for something aren't you?"

"I can't imagine what…"

"Look, we've had trouble in the past, my _sister?" _

"Yeah, I don't like to brag, but, I'm hittin' that." Godzilla shot at him. He ducked for cover.

"Where the Hell is she?"

"We don't live together, but she's in a cave over there." He pointed.

"Okay. I'll leave you alone now."

"I won't leave you sister's hot body alone!" Kong called after him.

Godzilla found the cave, went in.

"Hi Godzilla." Biollante said as he walked in.

"Hey vine head. I'd like to talk to you in private."

"Okay. She told Godzookie to outside. He obeyed.

"Alright, what do you wanna talk about?"

"I'll be blunt: Why the Fuck are you dating Kong? What the Hell?"

"I like Kong. He's a nice, gental person if you get to know him. You should nicer to each other."

"_Nicer? _Look at this!" Godzilla showed her a bite mark on his arm. "You're _Gentle Man _did this to me!"

"Well, Maybe-"

"No! He's not a gentel person and you can't date him!"

"Who are you, my dad?"

"I might as well be! I will be the shit out of you if you continue to date him!"

"Why an't I?"

"Because you are my sister. It's a mark against me, it's a mark against you, and mark agsint your son. Do you want that?"

"You can't control me!" She was crying now.

"I damn well can! You will not see this boy ever again!"

"I hate you! I hate you!" She went running out. Godzilla followed.

"Honey, were are you going?"

"Over to Kong's! Andwe're going all the way!"

"You haven't already?:"

"Well, we have but…"

"Have you been drinking?"

'Ahut up! I hate you!" She went running off into the night. Godzookie followed her. And then Godzilla got angry.

As Kong was sitting comforting Biollante, he heard something outside. He went walking up to the cliff and was horrified by what he saw.

_To be continued…_


	6. Chapter 6

Hello, I'm Nick Dahdah

Sorry I missed last week.

Gay monster Sex and the City

In new york, two sissy monsters were viciously stepping on cars. Yeah, they thought they was bad foo, they was gonna mess you up.

When GINO and Cloverfield met each on a street conorer, it was love at first sight. And after they started talking to each other, they realized they were both male. Awesome! They were both extreamly gay

After night fell, they sunk behind the school and started to make out, but they had to run away as a bunch of missiles came firing at them. And tat was when they were in a blue state! As soon as they got into Kentucky, they were messed up man! Dude…You really don't want to know what happened there.

After that they escaped from America, and made their way across the atlantic ocean, to the coast of Africa, where they both picked up AIDs (We're not sure how exactly) They, they made it to the Indian ocean, and swam from there to Japan, and from Japan to Monster Island.

There, they had sex and were walked upon by Godzilla (You already read that)

After that, Godzilla found them again, and blew them apart with a Ninja.

Godzilla's revenge (Again)

…Godzilla looked up at Kong, standing like a coward on his perch. Godzilla roared up at him, and charged through the door on the side. When he came by the pool therethe snake thing jumped out at him. Godzilla grabbed it, and started to whip Kong with it.

Kong threw up his arms to defend himself,but threw them aside, and howeled at Godzilla, who ran forward, and smashedKong up against the wall. He beat Kong's skull into the wall, but Kong punched him in the stomach. Godilla bellowed a cry of pain, and bit into Kong's shoulder, cuasgin him to howl out.

"Godzilla stop! You two don't have to fight over me!"

"Shut up object!" they both said. Then, Kong brought his fist up, and beat Godzilla's face in with it.

Godzilla's head moved, but nothing else. Then, he lit up his spines, and blew Kong's face off. Then he picked up the body, and flung it into Biollante, and shot atomic fire at them both.

Godzilla was walking away from Skull island, when he looked over his shoulder to Kong and Biollante, saying "Bye Man! See you next time!" He waved. They waved back.

_MORE NEXT WEEK!_


End file.
